Tuesday, 19 April 2011

Thoughts On Being Older

This post is long overdue. I am sorry that I failed to keep my promise to put up this post over the weekend. Something came up and I could not find the time to do it. Anyway here goes. First some pictures.

My birthday cake baked by my friend Ruth. It was delicious. Look at that, 11 candles means that I turned 11. How about that :)

Blowing out the candles for the second time because the 1st time we where out side and we failed to light them up since the wind kept blowing them out.

For sometime now I have been struggling with the idea that I am almost leaving my 20s behind and am on the verge of opening the door to my 30s. Honestly I am not yet ready for my 30s, so I think anyway. I always thought that by this time I would be living some of my dreams or at least well on the way of doing so but this is not so in some aspects.
Months ago I remember reading an article on Boundless magazine which had an impact on me. Unfortunately I have forgotten who the author was but I will always remember what she wrote. The author of the article was talking about the things that she had hoped to be but will now never be and she shared how she was learning to let go of those dreams and instead focus on embracing the things she could/will be.
At this point in my life I am realizing that there are things that I will never be or can never have or do because the time for that is past but there are things that I can still be, do and have.

The things I wanted to be by this time
1. I always wanted to meet the man who would be my husband and get married to him very young, like say before I was 25. I hoped that we would spend a couple of years just me and him  getting to know each other, traveling and establishing ourselves before we had children. But here I am still yet to meet my husband to be.
2. I wanted to have my 1st child before but I was 30. From the look of things that will not be case. That is one dream I have to let go of.
3.I always thought that by now I would well on my way of establishing my career in my preferred field, again this is yet to come to pass.

For a while I felt miserable about these things that could have been, but then after a while realised  it was not the end of the world but was only the beginning of something different. I can make my 30s my 20s :) I am still going to marry the man of my dreams and have my children even though it is going to be later than I anticipated. All things will still work together for my good. God just has a different plan for my life than I thought. 
On the plus side I have had the opportunity to enjoy part of my 20s as a single woman, independent and without much responsibility. My 20s has been a time when I have matured  as a person and  my relationship with God has metamorphosed. God has been molding me over the years into the person He wants me to be and intended me to be.

Here is to all that I desired to be but never was and cannot be and all that is to be and could be. My God is still good.

4 comments:

  1. Glad you had fun on your birthday! Honestly, there are so many things i was supposed to have accomplished by now, but alas. Still, it's never to late. Today is always the beginning!

    xoxo
    Adiya

    ReplyDelete
  2. happy bday!!!



    xoxo from rome
    K.
    http://kcomekarolina.blogspot.com/

    ReplyDelete
  3. Thanks for stopping by and for the b.day message k come karolina.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Beautiful, beautiful reflections. Most times we put a cap on the time to realize our dreams, but God's time is ALWAYS the best.

    ReplyDelete

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