This 'n' that

Lately there have been a lot changes in my life, one of them being that I moved to a new town. So far things are going well but initially I was concerned about whether I would find a good church to go to since the church I was going to before I moved is not found here.The place I have moved to is a very small town, one of those places where most people know each other or at least are familiar with each other. There are very few shops especially clothing shops so if I want to do some serious shopping I have to got to one of the nearby big towns.

The first week I arrived I googled up the local churches, had a look at their websites and I selected the ones I thought I would be most comfortable going to. I am one person who loves church and I usually go to church most Sundays unless something beyond my control prevents me from going. So my first Sunday I went to one of the churches I had selected. I was taught that as a Child of God you are never a stranger in His house but in this particular church I failed to feel comfortable. People were occasionally glancing my way and yet no one came to greet me or talk to me. It made me feel very uncomfortable. I could not figure out if it was because I was the only one of me there or if it was because they rarely got new people and so when someone new came people would be curious. After the service I just picked up my Bible and notebook and left but I knew this was not the place for me.

The second week (last Sunday) I went to another church and I think I have found home. From the moment I arrived people where coming up to me greeting me and engaging me in small talk. I immediately felt at home. Someone even got me a drink and the Pastor came over to greet me and I was like "wow". After the service more people came to chat with me and I never felt out of place plus the service was good... oh I loved their praise and worship session. So I will be going there again this week and I am looking forward to making it my church. 

Has anyone gone through this kind of thing? I guess its one of the down sides of moving to small towns where there are fewer churches to choose from especially for people like me who are rather particular about the churches they go to.

Have a blessed weekend everyone!

Shadowlands

This song is very special to me. Late last year I went through a season where I was going through life in a haze. I couldn't tell if I was coming or going and I just couldn't see or figure out the direction my life was going.

I would sing along to this song countless times. When I listened to it I would enter my own little world because it would touch me deeply and stir me up. It was my way of communicating with God, letting Him know that I was hanging onto His promises that He made in His Word and that though I could not see where I was going I believed  He was walking 'with me through the cloud into the sun'.  I also looked up a couple of Scriptures which I would continuously mediate on every chance I got and slowly but surely things began to be clearer and shape up.

When going through difficult times it is very easy to break down and concentrate on what we are going through. Our challenges can easily become all that we think about and talk about such that they begin to dominant our lives. I have learnt that this is not the best way to handle our challenges. I have learnt that when we go through hard times and we find ourselves unable to think straight and take on a positive attitude we should confess what the Word of God says. The more we make confessions based on the Word of God the more the situation will change and the more our burdens will ease up. Talking from experience the Word of God works, what the Lord promised to do He will surely do, if only we can have faith in Him, trust Him and NEVER GIVE UP - Isaiah 53: 10 -11 

       As the rain and the snow
       come down from heaven,
       and do not return to it
       without watering the earth
       and making it bud and flourish,
       so that it yields seed for the sower and bread for the eater,

       so is my word that goes out from my mouth:
       It will not return to me empty,
       but will accomplish what I desire
       and achieve the purpose for which I sent it.

Guess What?????

I graduated!!!!!Yes, last week and it was an awesome event. Although I had to travel back and forth from where I live (I have to admit it was a bit tiring), the journey was worth it and I was able to see my friends and catch up.

Here are some pictures for your viewing

Snacks at the reception after the ceremony.

My friends and I posing for the camera (Check out my funny pose).

It was rather sad though that most of my classmates could not make it for the ceremony but those of us who made it we tried to enjoy on their behalf :) and will be sharing photos with them. The journey of studying was an amazing one. Besides benefiting academically I was also able to make new friends, travel a lot and learn a lot about other cultures. I am definitely a much wiser person than I was before I began the programme. I thank God for opening the door for me to be able to do this.

Complicated and Confusing? or Straightforward and Simple?

I am a great fan of Elisabeth Elliot and couldn’t agree more with what she says in her book Quest for Love that dating and relationships have become very complicated and confusing today.  Talk about radical feminism and the language of rights and equality which she says ‘seem to be the only acceptable language today’, have added their fair share of confusion to relationships.  For instance, if a man and a woman have lunch together, each wonders, ‘Will he/she freak out if I offer to pay? Or if I don’t offer to pay’. One just does not know what to expect anymore.

I spent some time in Scandinavia and I was surprised to discover that it was the norm that when you went on a date with someone it was usually assumed you would split the bill unless the man offered to pay for you.  I found it weird because back home when you go out on a date it is the man who always pays in fact most guys would take pride in doing so. Thank God I had been warned in advance and I saved myself from embarrassment. Maybe I am the only one but there have been times were I have found myself tiptoeing when it comes to dating.

Everyone has their views about dating and relationships - the dos and the don't s and so on,  but as a Christian woman I believe that I should make wise choices in line with the Word of God. I am very grateful for Boundless a web magazine which I got to know about through the blog of From now Till I do. The web zine discusses all sort of issues like dating and courtship, marriage, being single, careers and faith issues. I have been able to get insight on many questions I have had for a long time but had never gotten satisfactory answers to. Now as I continue to read this magazine I feel like I am growing in wisdom and have been making more informed decisions especially in the dating arena.

Occasionally I come across stories and people who inspire me; in fact I have an Inspiration Folder where I collect stories, pictures and anything that inspires me and I love going through this special folder whenever I need a dose of inspiration. I want to share a true story I came across years ago but have forgotten where I got it from or who wrote it but anyway here goes, I hope it inspires you the way it always does me :-

HOMECOMING
 Author Unknown

While waiting to pick up a friend at the airport in Portland, Oregon, I had one of those life changing experiences that you hear other people talk about, the kind that sneaks up on you unexpectedly.

This one occurred a mere two feet away from me. Straining to locate my friend among the passengers deplaning through the jet way, I noticed a man coming toward me carrying two light bags. He stopped right next to me to greet his family.

First he motioned to his youngest son (maybe six years old) as he laid down his bags. They gave each other a long, loving hug. As they separated enough to look in each other's face, I heard the father say, "It's so good to see you, son. I missed you so much!" His son smiled somewhat shyly, averted his eyes and replied softly, "Me, too, Dad!"

Then the man stood up, gazed in the eyes of his oldest son (maybe nine or ten) and while cupping his son's face in his hands said, "You're already quite the young man. I love you very much, Zach!" They too hugged a most loving, tender hug.

While this was happening, a baby girl (perhaps one or one-and-a-half) was squirming excitedly in her mother's arms, never once taking her little eyes off the wonderful sight of her returning father. The man said, "Hi, baby girl!" as he gently took the child from her mother. He quickly kissed her face all over and then held her close to his chest while rocking her from side to side. The little girl instantly relaxed and simply laid her head on his shoulder, motionless in pure contentment.

After several moments, he handed his daughter to his oldest son and declared, "I've saved the best for last," and proceeded to give his wife the longest, most passionate kiss I ever remember seeing. He gazed into her eyes for several seconds and then silently mouthed, "I love you so much!" They stared at each other's eyes, beaming big smiles at one another, while holding both hands. For an instant they reminded me of newlyweds, but I knew by the age of their kids that they couldn't possibly be.

I puzzled about it for a moment then realized how totally engrossed I was in the wonderful display of unconditional love not more than an arm's length away from me. I suddenly felt uncomfortable, as if I was invading something sacred, but was amazed to hear my own voice nervously ask, "Wow! How long have you two been married?"

"Been together fourteen years total, married twelve of those," he replied, without breaking his gaze from his lovely wife's face.

"Well, then, how long have you been away?" I asked.

The man finally turned and looked at me, still beaming his joyous smile.

"Two whole days!"

Two days? I was stunned. By the intensity of the greeting, I had assumed he'd been gone for at least several weeks, if not months. I know my expression betrayed me, I said almost offhandedly, hoping to end my intrusion with some semblance of grace (and to get back to searching for my friend), "I hope my marriage is still that passionate after twelve years!"

The man suddenly stopped smiling. He looked me straight in the eye, and with forcefulness that burned right into my soul, he told me something that left me a different person. He told me, "Don't hope, friend ... decide!"

Then he flashed me his wonderful smile again, shook my hand and said, "God bless!" With that, he and his family turned and strode away together. I was still watching that exceptional man and his special family walk just out of sight when my friend came up to me and asked, "What'cha looking at?"

Without hesitating, and with a curious sense of certainty, I replied, "My future!"

Lesson: How a marriage or relationship turns out is depended on what the people involved decide to make it. The decision and initiative is up to us.

What kind of legacy?

I was flicking through the TV channels the other day trying to see if there was anything interesting to see  when I came across a programme which was talking about Princess Diana. Although I watched the programme for just a few minutes it got me thinking. Princess Diana died more than 10 years ago but her legacy still lives on. When she died I too was heart broken, she was someone I had grown to love. I remember watching on TV millions of people mourning her and the pictures of the many many flowers people all over the world sent her stuck to my mind for a while because I had never seen anything like that before.

Princess Diana left her own kind of legacy and so have many others both high profile  and ordinary people who have passed on. What about me? One day I too will leave this world to be with the Lord. Just the thought of being with the Lord in heaven excites me. No more pain, sickness but then what kind of legacy am I going to leave behind. My family, friend's, colleagues, neighbors, fellow brethren and so on when they think of me what will they remember about me? Will they smile because of fond memories that will come to their minds or will they frown and not want to think about me?

I realize that whatever legacy I am going to leave behind will depend on how I choose to live my life today. Do I reach out to others, am I a shoulder to lean on when I am needed and do I practice my love for other people?

The following is an excerpt of what singer Nicole Nordeman had to say about what kind of legacy she would want to leave behind:

I don't mind if you've got something nice to say about me
And I enjoy an accolade like the rest
You could take my picture and hang it in a gallery
Of all who's who and so-n-so's that used to be the best
At such'n'such ... it wouldn't matter much 

I won't lie, it feels alright to see your name in lights
We all need an 'Atta boy' or 'Atta girl'
But in the end I'd like to hang my hat on more besides
The temporary trappings of this world

I want to leave a legacy,

 How will they remember me?

Did I choose to love? Did I point to you?,

Enough to make mark on things,

I want to leave an offering,

A child of mercy and Grace who blessed your name apologetically,

And leave that kind legacy.

As for me I this is how I would want to be remembered:

1.  As someone who refused to live life as an observer but who chose to step out and take initiatives to positively impact the world around her. 
2. As a person loved with a passion, dreamed big, took chances and trusted God  unconditionally through the good and bad times.
3. As a woman who stood out as a good wife and mother.
4. As someone whose life radiated the glory and beauty of God.
5. As a person who though might have made mistakes, learnt from her mistakes and never let those mistakes define her or her future.
6. As someone who thrived for perfection, giving her all in whatever she did no matter how big or small the thing was.

Well, this is me and the kind of legacy I would like to leave behind. What kind of legacy would you want to leave behind? How would you want to be remembered - please do share your thoughts.

Wide Open Spaces

 

This is part of the scenery which is a stone throw away from the backyard of where I live. I took this picture this morning when I went for a walk, I could not resist because it was breath taking and refreshing. I love taking walks in scenic environments like this because I get to enjoy the beauty of nature and its always a conducive environment for me to have a heart to heart talk with God. I also get to clear my head and it has a calming effect on me.

In a week or so my life will be entering a different phase, a good one but one which I am a bit nervous about. I have found my self complaining constantly about some of the challenges and hassles I have been going through in relation to this change, being negative and not being too optimistic or having confidence in myself. Yesterday I was just like 'girl you have to stop being ungrateful, this change in your life is a good thing and a blessing but you are acting as if its not'. So this morning I went for a long walk, chatted with God and I found myself counting my blessings. Now I feel great. I am glad I took time out to clear my head. I have so much to be grateful for and here are some of the things that I am grateful for :

•  I have an awesome family. Although we have gone through many rough patches over the years it seems God was refining us and now we have a lot to shout about.
• I have made a lot of special friends over the years. I could write pages and pages about my friends. Some I met at school, some at varsity, some at work, some started out as pen-pals and so on. I have been amazed time and time again how these special people have been there for me on various occasions - distance being no hindrance. With some of my friends no matter how long we have not been in touch when we do get in touch we pick up right from were we left off and its as if we have always been in touch. 
• I am blessed to know God  and what His Word says about me. Because of that I can hold my head up high knowing that I am more than a conqueror, that the Lord is my provider hence I shall not want (Psalm 23) and that I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me (Philippians 4:13).
• I am healthy
• I have a job that many people would love to have which God just gave to me when I least expected it.
• I do not lack of anything. I have food to eat everyday and a roof over my head.

Yes, I have a lot to be thankful for. The Lord has been more than good to me.

The Danger of a single story

Image of African Princess from here

I came across this interesting video on CNN containing a speech by Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie a well known Nigerian writer, at a seminar sometime ago. I urge you to listen to her speech here , I thought it was a good speech and very enlightening . There are number of things that she said that got to me.

She talked about how when she was growing up she read mostly English and American books and how that affected the way she thought and saw things. I related a lot to what she was saying.

I have always been a bit of a book worm. Growing up I loved reading and read most of the books I could get my hands on. Like Chimamanda most of the books I had access to were English and American ones. I read the Nancy Drews, Hardy Boys, Enid Blyton books, Grims Fairy Tales, Hans Anderson Fairy Tales etc. Looking back I now realize that this in a way robbed me of something. I am not saying that it was bad reading these books because they helped mold me into an ambitious person who even  today hungers for more out of life but had I been exposed to more African themed books the way I saw life in general then would have been more balanced. My imaginations were full of long haired princesses like Rapunzel and gallant princes who lived in castles and rode horses and never kinky haired princes and princesses yet still even boys and girls living the life I lived in Africa. In a way I feel that I never really got to appreciate that the kind of life I lived, though different, was as good or maybe even better in some respects than that portrayed in the books I read. Yes, my world did not have the white Christmases I read about or associate Christmas with turkey dinners or have big houses with toy filled nurseries like the one Amelia Jane one of Enid Blyton's character's lived in etc but it still had a lot to offer and I was blessed. Those many holidays we went to our rural home and we would go into the forests to search for wild fruits and fire wood, go swimming in the rivers, help with herding the cattle and sit under the cool shadows of mango or guava trees eating their fruits in the hot African sun - those were special adventures on their own - unique and different. Its just that I took them for granted when I should not have. God made a diverse world, with different people who have different life styles - that is the beauty of it all. Imagine a world where all the people would have been the same, doing the same things wouldn't that have been boring? 

Another thing that Chimamanda talked about was the way that some people in the 'developed nations' view Africa.She gave an example of an American room mate who was shocked that she even knew Mariah Carey. I tell you this lady is hilarious she also told of how after someone read one of her books told her that it was sad that most African men were abusers and she responded saying that she had recently read a book about an American Psycho man and it was a sad that American men were psychos.

I have met people who seemed to walk on eggshells around me because they were afraid of offending me or sounding too boastful 'considering the life I had lived in Africa'. I have had people ask me if it was safe moving about because of the wild animals or if it was difficult growing up without much. Some people assume being from Africa automatically means I grew up without having enough and this happens to be a wrong assumption. I do not 100% blame people who think like this though, the media portrays Africa as a backward place associated with hunger, poverty and disease. Rarely does the media tell how beautiful it is or portray the good things about the continent.

No doubt one sided stories are dangerous. Listening to this lady's speech reminded me how important it is not to make judgments or reach conclusions based on single story/event/happening. There is usually more to discover and know than what meets the eye. Let us desire to have wisdom and insight (for it is a good thing) so that we do not  fall into the trap of  making conclusions on a single story. (Proverbs 4:5 - Get wisdom and get insight).